I need to find a new battlefield.

 

I spend my days in commerce; it keeps me interested, satisfies my need to be useful by employing my talents such as they are and, to date, has saved me from being a financial burden on others.

I need a new way of achieving these three objectives; I'd like to share the reasons why I believe this.

Commerce. The very unpretentious dictionary on my laptop defines commerce as: noun. 1 industry and commerce: trade, trading, buying and selling, business, dealing, traffic; (financial) transactions, dealings.

And that's OK I suppose; except in my experience commerce is very few of those activities. And no matter what price I paid I don't suppose I'd find a dictionary that defines commerce as I've come to experience it: talking about doing business; meeting; planning, without executing; being careful to never offend imagined sensibilities; allowing everyone to have, no matter how little talent, experience or competence, equal say in making important decisions; confusion about purpose; obfuscation; and lack of conviction and commitment. There is more but what's the point in listing more, if these realities don't eventually kill commerce I don't know what will.

It's just possible that the idiom let's not do anything in case something happens may have become an unspoken mantra for many in commerce; when things happen there are consequences - and consequences represent risk.

So for me, as an aging warrior, I need to find a new way of remaining relevant.

I need to find a new battlefield.